Searching for how to find happiness?
Well, the only way to find happiness is to stop searching, you already have it. All you have to do is unmask it. Problem is, that everyone tells us otherwise.
Related Post: How To Feel Better About Yourself
Here is What We Have Been Told About Happiness
We are told, (made to believe), that we need ‘things’ to be happy.
We need cars, fame, power and wealth etc-to be happy.
But, what if everything you have been told about happiness is a lie?
In this guide, we will examine what happiness is and the actions, mindset, and events that result in this experience and see how we can cultivate these behaviors to ensure lasting happiness in our lives
What is Happiness? Let’s Redefine Happiness
To show you how to find happiness, I must first help us understand what happiness is, and how happiness (or our emotions) is influenced.
According to Wikipedia, ‘happiness is used in the context of mental or emotional states, including positive or pleasant emotions ranging from contentment to intense joy.[1] It is also used in the context of life satisfaction, subjective well-being, eudaimonia, flourishing, and well-being.
According to thisiscalmer.com, Happiness is a mental state of experiencing positive or pleasant emotions.
Happiness is a state of being. It comes as a result of your mindset/beliefs.
Why Would A Poor Man In Nigeria Feel Happier or More Satisfied Than A Typical American with A Good Job?
Because happiness does not depend on what you have but on who you are or rather what you believe.
Your beliefs, aspirations, expectations, knowledge, or ideas about life, do influence how you feel per time.
A poor man, who sees nothing wrong with his state of lack would worry less and have little or no fears/expectations about his future.
An American Kid who thinks life should ‘always be good to be acceptable’ experiences a traumatic situation when things go unpleasant.
So, you see, happiness is subjective to who we are-how we view life and our expectations or beliefs of life.
TO FIND HAPPINESS, Change Your Beliefs
To find happiness, change your beliefs. This statement is the root of the slogan we are all familiar with; ‘happiness is within you’.
You can instantly find happiness by merely having a change of belief. And that is exactly how to find happiness. There is no other way.
What do I mean by that?
Pay Attention Here.
The belief that -owning a car, a house, and lots of money (means), will make you happy (result), determines whether you would be happy or not.
The idea or belief (that owning these things) would make us happy shapes our happiness- not the things themselves.
Note that, It is the idea or belief that influences our state.
The money, cars, houses, and life on the beach- may not necessarily bring or guarantee this feeling (though it can bring it momentarily)- but it never really is what sustains happiness.
A Man With A Different Belief System Would FEEL Differently
Hope you are with me on this journey of finding happiness within. Friends, I am excited as I write this because the whole world needs to change the beliefs we have attached or had about happiness.
That is why I talked about the ‘LIE’ or wrong programming when we started this conversation.
The fact that everyone ‘thinks’ and ‘unconsciously’ believes that we need these ‘things- mentioned above- to feel happy, makes us feel unhappy until we have them.
But why are Monks or Poor People Living in Poor Nations Still Happy?
The answer, is they have a different beliefs.
It is your belief in the means(car, money, houses, fame, success, etc) to the end (happiness), that controls or determines your state of happiness or depression.
If we all can see this trap (lie) and alter our beliefs (in the means), then we can alter how we feel every single day.
What If There Are Better /Alternative Means To This End (happiness)?
What if there are certain (other) real means or beliefs we could practice that allow us easily generate happiness?
Fortunately, there are many proven means (things we can believe, become or do) to create, generate or unmask this feeling of joy, pleasantness, and peace daily.
If they are, What Are they?
The Beliefs, & Behaviors That Unmask Happiness Daily.
As we discussed earlier, the first step to finding happiness is to eliminate the basic belief that material things lead to happiness.
The next step to finding happiness is to imbibe the beliefs and practices that generate and sustains this emotion effortlessly.
And What are these beliefs and behaviors?
Belief 1; Happiness is Independent of Things
To find happiness, you must first understand, that you can train yourself to feel happy regardless of the events in your life
“You can’t afford to tie your happiness to a future goal or the great memories of the past”.
When I understood this, everything changed. Literarily, it took me months to meditate on this belief and accept it.
So, it’s okay, if you don’t understand what I am talking about.
But you may have to come back again and again to this post or purchase my book (when it is out) to get more.
Emotional Maturity Through Faith
We may not be able to control the events that unfold in our lives, but we can control how we react or feel about them.
There are events in our lives that we can not control, for example, losing a loved one, loss of a job or source of livelihood, etc, but you can 100% control how you react or choose to feel about the situation.
However, you can choose to believe that the universe is always in your favor and that things will always work out fine in the end.
We must cry if we have to, but we do not despair, because we have built a solid hope in the universe’s benevolence and wisdom.
Those who fail to build this belief system, are prone to depression.
Happiness Is Tired To Relationships Not Things-We Are Social Beings
What does the term ‘unconditional Love’ mean to you?
How often do you forgive? When last did you give someone a gift?
How kind and understanding are you? These are behaviors that determine how happy you would be.
I had to learn these people management skills to thrive in my relationships.
Being kind, understanding and patient generates this good feeling within me, that makes me feel good about myself.
How To Find Happiness; Conclusion/Actionable steps
Here is what I suggest you do right now to help you feel happier daily- Try to love yourself and others unconditionally.
Plus, trust in the Universe’s benevolence. And most importantly, believe in yourself.
I hope this helps someone begin the journey of unmasking the happiness within.
I will be happy to hear your feedback on this post.
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